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Why World Government Isn't so Scary

From fundamentalist doomsday prophecies to anti-whoever propaganda, everyone has bee stoking fears of a unified world government. Here's why world government is closer than you think, completely harmless, and nothing like the UN.

It's a pretty clear summary of history to say that people have never liked people from another place. The minute you try to bring people together they find excuses to split. We all believe that a world government won't work because our own countries are already too big to be run by the same people. If we just spin off New York, California, and Texas, the rest of Americans could get some peace finally. That's the conventional wisdom. It has a good point, but is it the whole story?

Sunnis and Shias, believers and doubters, shouldn't we all be able to get along? Even those who preach tolerance, forgiveness, and WWJD seem to forget who they are in an election year. Government is serious business and woe to those who don't control their government. Sunnis and Shias have something real to be afraid of. Where the power isn't, the pain is.

So is it power that we are afraid of? Not quite. It's other people's power. Different people. Different people making rules for you!

In a representative (i.e. half-ass) democracy like in the USA, your vote counts for almost nothing. It's only when you can get together in a group, sing a few songs, and act together that you can feel like you have any say over the rules. Imagine you weren't just voting against Texans and New Yorkers. Imagine the Sunnis and Shias and even the Saudis were voting against your vision of a perfect nation, under god or otherwise.

What if governments didn't have power? What if they didn't train police or soldiers? Would you be afraid to share your government then? The time for that kind of government is here.

True direct democracy is possible today. For the first time in history, people from around the world could participate in direct elections together. In the inverse of Murphy's Law, anything good that can happen will happen - and in fact it has happened.

I invite you to take part in a grand experiment. A new nation is being formed - a global nation. And it has a new kind of government, of all people, by all people, and for all people. Its only border is here on the world wide web, and we call it Damabopia.

Sponsor me! - part deux

Read part 1

Well your response was overwhelming, but I really can't accept endorsement deals that I just don't believe in. That's why below this post, I'm only recommending products that I've actually used, except for Ann Coulter's newsletter. Anyway, these are ALL quality products/services or I wouldn't let them pay me through Google Adsense

Sanctuary found

Four years and two weeks ago, I escaped from 'the Island' and found means to publish the truth. In all that time, the secret of my identity has remained safe - the truth still has a voice.

And now, the truth has a home. Mr. X has officially accepted Damabopian citizenship, escaping the need for secrecy in my old homeland. There is talk of a ministerial appointment, but we'll let the Damabopian officials make the announcements. For now, rest assured that Mr. X is no longer operating behind the veil of censorship.

You too can find sanctuary at the hidden city-state. Apply for citizenship before it's too late.

Sponsor me!

Last Friday a former CEO implicated longest-serving Republican senator, Ted Stevens (aka. 'series of tubes'), in charges of extortion, conspiracy, and bribery. Once at the helm of oil services company, VECO, Bill Allen has entered a guilty plea and is giving up all the details... money was handed out to legislators, but the real headline was that VECO employees were sent lift Sen. Stevens' ski resort home and build two bedrooms, a game room and sauna underneath. Allen even gifted some used furniture and hired Stevens' son, Ben (now a senator) as a consultant. No one is talking about what the bribes were for - presumably business as usual.

Speaking of business as usual, sponsored news stories have become so mainstream that perennial media wallflower, CNN, has started acknowledging them. "Study: firearms help treat mental illness - brought to you by BLAMosil. But seriously, if CNN thinks you don't mind... YOU DON'T.

By the way, this is the sponsored 'news' story that was on CNN today:








If you'd like to sponsor an article or formal research study, write to buymeice@bigpimping.edu.

Deep Throat Danger Exposed!

Some in the media were quick to jump on the recent Johns Hopkins study linking oral HPV (human papillomavirus) to an increased risk of developing throat cancer. Big news for givers and receivers of fellatilingus, whose throats would be better off funneling bathtub gin and cigarette smoke.

Internet celebrity and author of the Savage Love column, Dan Savage, was one to quickly point out the study's seeming importance. But that week's article has been pulled. Supposedly, that's because Mr. Savage blundered on his HPV vaccine facts, but as always X Sama brings you the real scoop. Someone or something strong-armed Savage into removing the piece, keeping the story from the majority of his sexually liberated audience.

Sensing some profane relation to the virus, I sent my last surviving ninja to investigate the most likely culprits. Deep in the Skull & Bones tomb lies a curs-ed text said to predict the rebirth of George Bush Senior. Alas, my worst fears were confirmed when Mabo returned with a page from the devilish scripture. The critical passage reads, "...and he shall rise ag'in not from woman and her womb, but from a tracheal swelling of malignant consequence... the unholy egg shall be fertilized by agent hidden within carnal nectar... and the Dark Lord shall burst from the gullet of his host on the sixth moon of the fifth cycle..."

We know what this means. On the moment of the ex-President's death, his soul will search for a ripe HPV-induced throat tumor from which to rebirth itself in flesh and renew it's dominion over hell and earth. We have only one hope: that at that precise moment there will be no host, no ripe throat cancer. We can drive his soul back to the underworld if only we can defeat oral HPV infections.

Women, get your Gardasil shots. Men, stop giving oral sex. You now have an excuse.